TUMO x h-pem | 'The unforeseen revival' by Naneh Harutyunyan

Poetry 

The Scream, 1893 by Edvard Munch (Courtesy of edvardmunch.org)

The unforeseen revival

(An ekphrastic poem inspired by the painting “The Scream” by Edvard Munch)
 

A big bang hit my world,
I’m no longer the same. 
I can’t control my mind, 
In my head, there’s a hurricane. 

Running over and over
Without an aim, 
I can’t find my position 
On this mazy land. 

Can’t control my emotions, 
Don’t know how to go on, 
Incapable of thinking, 
I’m standing here alone. 

I scream. I hope that somehow 
Somewhere on this earth right now 
Someone hears my trembling voice 
And helps me overcome this sore. 

What if I jump off this height and  
Free myself of the pain crushing inside? 
What if my body flies under the water 
And my soul dives into the sky? 
I imagine the shivers of my heart 
Dissolving in the calmness of the waves 
And my thoughts hanging in the air 
Like dense clouds willing to burst into tears. 

Dead silence. And the only sound I hear 
Is the heartbeat under my weak chest. 
But all of a sudden a voice breaks into my head 
Like someone has replied to my pointless yelp. 

Is it the ocean swashing under my feet? 
Or is it the dusk sky colored into red? 
Maybe it’s the forest with secrets on its way, 
Or the ground quakes under the force of my weight. 

I lastly understand. It is nature. 
It blares and roars insanely. 
The sound knocks in my head. 
I get hysterical like I am mad. 

The voice is so strong and loud.  
I’m not able to listen to it for long.
But it doesn’t stop or grow weaker,  
So I close my ears to lighten 
The pain passing through me so fast 
From my future and my past. 

I look around me to see what happens, 
But I find out that no one’s got troubles 
And no one else around hears the yell  
As everyone is pretending to be quiet. 

Am I certain this is nature? 
But why can I only hear its torture? 
No. The sound comes from inside, 
From the bottom of my heart. 

It is my soul. It has gone mad. 
But how has all this happened? 
Was it all a nightmare? Am I sleeping? 
I’ll wake up right now, in a minute. 
But wait, everything here is real: 
The sun is setting behind the hills, 
The water flows and splashes, 
Dry leaves on the ground swish, 
The passerby grunt and mumble. 

It was a vision of my fears 
That didn’t let me dry my tears. 
But was it something powerful enough 
To make going on so tough? 

I see brightness touching the dark horizon. 
I take a step back and stand on my feet firmly. 
I say to myself loudly “I shouldn’t.” 
My new self holds me back from collapsing. 

“This isn’t the end,” I say. 
“I should go on and make a new beginning. 
As long as I feel this world shining, 
The universe will see me rising."